Posts Tagged ‘gimme money

20
Aug
10

Hey guys, if I make a bunch of stuff up that makes me a good breeder! AKA, stupidest rat breeder ever.


Ad Text:

Hello,

We have some very nice selective rat weanlings for adoption. We have the most incredible Black Rat called the Black Phantom. If you are looking for a Black Rat look no further. We have Tan and White Berkshires, Tan and White Rex, Brown and White Berkshires and Rex. We have Black and White Berkshires and Rex to if interested. We have these rats for fun and when we get too many we just have to put some up for adoption. Our surplus is your gain. These are not pet store rats. The parents have been put together from all over the country from selectively sought after rats. We take our rats very seriously. The price is firm. We have not put any of our rats for adoption recently so they will be adopted fast. Here are some pics of our current pups for adoption. They are about 3 weeks old and will be weaned soon for pickup. Also if you are looking for any certain colors we have it now or will have it soon. We have blues browns tans and albinos if interested. Also we have some multi colored too. The last but most important thing is that all of these rats have been hand raised from day one. They are very calm and do not nip. They are really amazing. Come check one out when you get the chance.

We currently have Dumbo Rats for adoption and they are really nice. We also have some gorgeous Blue and Brown Hooded babies. We have varigated and multi-colored also. We will have weaned rats available for adoption on August 19th. Please call or write and tell me what you are looking for.

Rehoming Fees START at 10.00 each. Please inquire for what you are interested in. We have many unique rats for adoption.

We also have a few older rats around 1 year of age. They are available for adoption if you are looking for a wonderful mature pet that requires just a ton of love. Please inquire if you are interested in adopting an older rat.

Thanks for looking,
Bill
303-[redacted]

There’s so much stupid in this ad I can’t even know where to begin criticizing it, so first let me link some responsible rat breeders (yes, they exist) who would never, ever, ever dream of finding adopters through Craigslist.

Responsible Rat Breeder 1
Responsible Rat Breeder 2

Notice something those sites have in common? It’s called a “waiting list,” and it’s what responsible breeders keep so that they don’t have to look for homes for babies on the most notoriously awful pet sales/adoption website in the country.

But then again, this guy isn’t responsible. Now, none of these errors would be anything to hoot and holler about if they came from a pet owner seeking a good home for rats he or she could no longer keep. But this Bill character is setting himself up as a breeder who is a source for premium, fantastical, highly in demand (but not enough so for a BLOODY GOLDARN WAITING LIST) rats. So, let’s pick apart his ad for reasons this dumbass shouldn’t be breeding at all, shall we?

1. “We have the most incredible Black Rat called the Black Phantom.” There is no such thing as a Black Phantom Rat. These are the known and repeatable rat colors that exist. “New” colors must go through an approval process with a show organization. See, the phenotype of a rat (what you see when you look at it) results from its genotype (the genes creating that appearance), and new color genes just don’t spring up all over the place.

This here is the supposed black phantom, which in reality is just a solid black rat. Nothing special about it whatsoever:

Plain black rat.

Look, the rat is black. Wow. Just like the millions of other rats that have been born with black fur.

(this is a long one, so you’re going to have to click through to read the whole thing!)
Continue reading ‘Hey guys, if I make a bunch of stuff up that makes me a good breeder! AKA, stupidest rat breeder ever.’

18
Aug
10

In which we post a Worstof that has nothing to do with Craigslist.


Post Text:

WarmFuzzy’s Shelter Sanctuary Just checked our standing in TheAnimalRescueSite.com shelter challenge. Very depressing. Looks like unless darn near everybody votes for WarmFuzzy’s, Drexel, MO we’re nowhere close to winning. Time to start working on shutting the shelter down & deciding who to euthanize first.

First things first: As anyone who reads this blog (yes, all three of you!) knows, I support rescue and have nothing but the utmost respect for anyone whose calling in life involves saving the lives of pets through rescue or shelter work.

Now that that’s out of the way… Are you freaking kidding me?! This organization’s entire fundraising strategy is based on winning a contest on the Internet, without which they can’t stay open? And their strategy FOR winning that contest is to threaten to start killing the pets in their care?

There’s a cliche in the horse rescue world: “The truck is coming!” This implies that horses waiting to be saved will be sent to slaughter if kind-hearted folks don’t open their wallets. But, of course, horses are always being sent to slaughter, you can’t save them all, and if you do have the generosity to save one or several of them, you need to do a lot of research to make sure you’re not doing it through an organization that operates in such a way as to place the horses in a situation potentially worse than death. A rescue that uses last minute guilt trip fundraising is usually low on money to actually feed the animals they already have, and they may be overpaying to bail horses off the slaughter truck and thereby actually propping up the horse slaughter industry.

But this is the first time I’ve ever seen a small animal rescue use the “gun to the animals’ heads” approach, and they’re using it to beg for votes in an online contest. Protip: Maybe everyone is voting for organizations that actually have a comprehensive plan to keep a roof over their animals’ heads even if they don’t get a sudden windfall? Or organizations that when they call themselves “no kill” or a “sanctuary” raise funds to actually not kill the animals? Or organizations whose leadership reacts to a crisis by getting seriously active on fundraising, rather than by leaving passive-aggressive Facebook notes threatening to start killing cats?

Now, apparently the shelter was damaged by a tornado, prompting this funding crisis. My sympathies to all affected by natural disasters, but that’s why you carry insurance. So that you don’t find yourself without an emergency fund, without a building, and without a better plan than “Let’s threaten the cats until people vote for us!”

12
Aug
10

Inability to afford a pet on my part constitutes an emergency on your part!


Ad Text:

Need some help; I have a cocktail that needs to go to the vet, to get some broken feathers plucked.
We live in a low-income building and cannot afford to take him to the vet, I have a quote for 150.00 to get it done in a vet now..
Is there anyone who can pay this for us?
We can go to the vet of your choice if need be, but need it done soon.
So u know his name is Franky
he is the white,grey and yellow on the left

Please help us out, you can call me at 303-[redacted] and ask or saul

Hey, did you know that when other people irresponsibly keep pets who they can’t afford to provide humane care for, it’s an emergency for you? That is, if you’re a bird lover. If you don’t want to pay for Saul’s bird’s vet bills, you must just not be a bird lover. In fact, you probably hate birds and wish they’d all die sad, painful deaths of unplucked feathers while their poor, starving owner looks at you with mournful eyes as his children moan for just one more piece of bread, papa. Yes you, bird hater, you’re so cruel, aren’t you?

Don’t even think about suggesting that Saul ask for recommendations for a vet who might take payments. That’s not how a bird lover should talk. Nor should you suggest that Saul take out a loan or, hell, canvass his neighborhood offering to perform 10 odd jobs at $15 each. That’s just insanity. He shouldn’t have to be inconvenienced to free his pet from a painful health problem.

I’ve got an idea: How about someone helps poor Saul by offering Franky a good home in a household where his vet care will be paid for by his owner? Oh, and while you’re at it, perhaps you can relieve Saul of the several other birds he seems to have somehow mysteriously acquired, probably through no fault of his own, I bet they just flew through the window of his “low income building” and demanded expensive food and vet care.

Cockatiels on Cage

25
Jun
10

More than meets the eye… and a nasty surprise for a spouse?


Ad Text:

Ive posted a few times on here already about my 9 weeks old shar pei mix puppie
he is a really good dog its just not working out at our apartments and with our son
if anyone is interested please let me know
I dont want to give him back to where we got him I think he would be heart broken I would rather find him a happy home with a yard
I paid 350 for him Im willing to go as low as 200

This is bad enough as it is. The puppy is all of nine weeks, so he could legally have been sold in his state (Colorado) only one week ago. Unfortunately many BYBs don’t obey the law, so maybe he’s been in his home as much as three weeks. The poster hasn’t even given the puppy a month to adjust to his new home. Let me guess: An impulse buy at a pet store or from a BYB, with absolutely no thought put into whether or not a puppy would fit into his owner’s lifestyle.

But wait… there’s more! A few posts up we found this:


Ad Text:

so sorry too anyone that has responded to this add for a shar pei puppy for sale
he is not for sale aparently someone and I are not seeing eye to eye on this for some reason
he is not desperate for a home he is happy here with me and there would be no reason to ask for some stranger to pay you money if he would have somewhere to go Mr. price!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, apparently the Shar Pei has been offered a home by someone who actually met the puppy, perhaps already has it in their home (“he is happy here with me”) and is willing to keep it for good. And yet, our charmer up above is trying to peddle the pup for $200 to anybody with a yard, apparently without even notifying this person, who may or may not actually be the dog’s owner.

I’ve come up with a few possible backgrounds for this story, all equally full of fail. Place your bets in the comment section.

  • The two posters are the two parents of the first poster’s son. Parent A got the puppy; Parent B didn’t want a puppy and instead of discussing the matter with Parent A, tried to earn a couple hundred bucks selling it on Craigslist.
  • The first poster and second poster are friends. Poster A couldn’t keep the puppy and promised it to Poster B, but without notifying her decided to sell it instead.
  • The puppy actually belongs to Poster B but was sold to Poster A with a promise to return it to Poster B if things didn’t work out. Instead, Poster A wants to find someone with a yard to buy the puppy for $200. Poster B may or may not be an appropriate home for the dog (and yes, Shar Peis CAN live in a home without a yard, if they get proper exercise) and is probably a BYB, but a moderately tolerable one if he/she takes back puppies that don’t work out in their new homes.
  • The puppy doesn’t even belong to Poster A at all; the story is totally made up and Poster A intended to sell a friend or spouse’s puppy quick and tell Poster B that it ran away. Unfortunately Poster B happens to read Craigslist and found their own puppy being sold!
  • They’re both the same person and both ads are faked in order to start some Craigslist drama.

If you have another idea as to what happened, post it as a comment!

Poor Pup:

25
May
10

Yeah, that’s why there are so many of them in shelters.


Ad Text:

WE NEED TO RE HOME OUR 5 YR OLD ROTT DUE TO OUR NEW LANDLORD. HE DOES NOT WANT HIS BREED HERE. THAT IS THE ONLY REASON HE IS ON HERE. HE IS 5 YRS OLD GREAT WITH KIDS AND OTHERS DOGS EXCEPT MALE DOGS. HE IS THE ALPHA DOG. HE WILL PLAY WITH THEM AT THE PARK AND DOG PARK BUT CAN NOT LIVE WITH THEM. HE IS HOUSEBROKEN NOT NEUTERED AND HAS A LONG TAIL. HE LIKES WALKS AND PLAYING FETCH AND LOVES CAR RIDES. HE ALSO KNOWS BASIC COMMANDS. HE IS A REAL GOOD BOY AND WOULD LIKE TO FIND AHOME THAT WILL LOVE HIM AND PAY ATTENTION TO HIM. HE IS NOT A OUTDOOR DOG HE LOVES TO BE INSIDE. RE-HOMING FEE IS $100 TO MAKE SURE HE GOES TO A GOOD HOME. MY LOSS YOUR GAIN HE IS WORTH A LOT MORE FOR HIS BREED. YOU ARE GETTING MORE THAN YOUR MONEY BACK HE IS A GREAT AND LOYAL FRIEND AND WILL NOT DO YOU WRONG.

“He is worth a lot more for his breed.” Sure, and that’s why the poster who’s so into money that he put nineteen dollar signs in the ad title is only asking $100. Because he could get way more for a middle-aged Rotty, but he simply chooses not to. Because every shelter isn’t already full of middle-aged Rotties who are there either because they have the hip and elbow issues typical of the breed at middle age and their owners didn’t want to pay, or because the owner didn’t train them properly, or because the owner moved somewhere that doesn’t allow the breed.

By the way, when I’m lucky enough to have a “great and loyal friend,” I usually try to pay them back with friendship and loyalty in return. Guess this guy’s definition of loyalty involves choosing to move somewhere that doesn’t allow Rottweilers and then selling his great friend for a hundred bucks on Craigslist.

Poor Rotty:

17
May
10

Free Mastiff, only $450


Ad Text:

I have a 11 month old Neopolitan Mastiff puppy that needs to be placed. He is grey with almost white eyes. He is an awesome puppy. I placed this add before because i was moving to N.Y. but my plans changed. But my plans have changed again and i am moving to N.Y. once again. I need to place him this week. He is house broken and crate trained. He weighs about 145 right now with lots of growing to still do. NEO’s grow until they are about 4 years old. I dont know how he would be with kids since he is very clumsy. So he might knock them down alot. He is very very friendly. He is fine with other dogs, i dont know how he will be with cats because he has never seen one. He comes with all his toys which includes a few old shoes and a bowling ball. I am not looking to “foster” him with anyone. He needs someone who will show him alot of attention, he never likes to be more than 6 inches away from you. Like i said, he is very big and very strong. He cost over 1000 when i got him. I am giving him up for free but there is a re-homing/delivery fee of 350 for him and 100 for the crate which is 3 x 3 x 4. The crate is steel with a plastic bottom pan and 2 doors on it. It also folds down to be flat. AThats a total of 450 for everything..Please call me this morning before 930 at 716-[redacted] or after that call or text me at 716-[redacted],,,i can deliver him tonight after 7 when i get out of work,,,He also comes with a 50lb bag of dog food

Giving him up for free? In the wise words of Inigo Montoya, “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”

The last time someone tried to charge me a $350 delivery fee to give me something free, it was a Nigerian scammer who wanted me to cash a fake money order from a deceased General. Craigslist Idiots: Now taking cues from Nigerian scammers.

Also, this is the least typey Neapolitan Mastiff I’ve ever seen, if it’s a Neo at all, rather than something like a Weim/Lab mix. Where are the wrinkles? The drooping eyelids? Why isn’t it longer than it is tall?

A typical Neo at 10 weeks (courtesy Wikimedia Commons):

This “Neo,” at 11 months:

14
May
10

Please please please please give my beloved dog a new home, but if you don’t pay enough for her I’d rather take her to the pound!

Ad Text:

DIAMON IS A LOVING GENTAL PITT/BOXER MIX SHE NEEDS RE-HOMING BECAUSE I CANNOT AFFORD THE MONTHLY CHARGE AT MY APARTMENT I REALLY WANT DIAMON TO GO TO A LOVING AND CARING HOME SHE IS GREAT WITH CHILDREN AND OTHER DOGS SHE LOVES TO GO ON LONG WALKS BECAUSE I WANT TO ENSURE SHE WILL GO TO THE BEST HOME POSSIBLE FOR HER I AM ASKING A RE-HOMING FEE OF $150-$175 AND IM SORRY I WILL NOT TAKE ANY LESS THEN THAT DIAMON WILL NEED TO BE IN A NEW HOME BY NEXT WEEK OR SHE WILL HAVE TO GO TO THE POUND PLEASE CALL ONLY IF YOU REALLY WANT HER OR HAVE QUESTIONS 303-[redacted] ( DIAMON IS UP TO DATE ON SHOTS AND IS SPAYED I HAVE PAPER WORK TO SHOW AND I DO NOT HAVE A CAR SO PICK UP ONLY)

Wow, clearly this loving owner only wants the best for a pet that must be rehomed due to circumstances outside of his control–because, of course, it wasn’t his fault that he decided to move into an apartment that charges a monthly pet fee. And of course, since he only wants the very, very best for his darling doggie, he’s going to give her to the pound if he can’t get at least $150 for her.

Yup, nothing but the best for Diamond–the best kennel at the pound where she can stare sadly at the best families walking past her to adopt other dogs, and eventually get the best syringe in her front leg as, like most Pit Bulls in Denver-area shelters, she’s put to sleep. That’d be much better for her than selling rehoming her for $125.

Update (looks like we weren’t the only ones irked by this):

Ad Text:

Lets be very clear on something I have no choice but to re-home Diamon and two i have a sick daughter and i have to pay hospital bills for her hospital stay so before you start to hate on someone learn the whole story because you dont know until you ask GROW UP AND GET A LIFE

Even if you believe this guy that it isn’t his fault he chose an apartment where he can’t afford the pet rent and that he’s only demanding $150 for his daughter’s hospital bills, this isn’t a “poor baby is getting picked on for doing the best thing by his dog” situation. Most shelters charge a surrender fee. So, best case, it’s an empty threat and he’ll end up selling Diamond for less than he says he requires. More likely, this is another made-up Craigslist sob story and he’ll keep trying until he gets his $150, probably well after the supposed deadline next week. Or, he’ll try to dump Diamond at a shelter, find out about the surrender fee, and abandon her anonymously in the middle of the night instead.

Poor Diamond.